These are unprecedented times. Have you heard? Of course you have. And you have probably said that same thing yourself. We are throwing this phrase about so much with the COVID-19 pandemic that it is becoming alarmingly normal to be living in unprecedented times.
Everyone has been impacted by the adjustments that have been made to preserve health and safety. And right about now, if it hasn’t already, it’s become a struggle. I’ve got to be honest, when I first learned of the restrictions at our local hospitals, I was angry. I was upset that the women who had chosen to have doulas at their birth would be forced to decide between having their partner present or their doula. But when I took some time to reflect on the severity of the situation, my heart was settled knowing that the restrictions were made for the health and safety of everyone, including me. So I changed my thinking and jumped on board with my doula sisters in being creative and inventive during the pandemic.
At the heart of the matter, my work as a doula is the same as it always has been. We have our prenatal visit and our postpartum visit, only now it occurs virtually using Facetime or Zoom. It’s important more than ever that we connect and discuss fears and worries about the upcoming birth. It’s coming together as a team, and an opportunity for me to reassure and encourage during what is such an uncertain and to some, scary time to have a baby. I am present for my clients, offering reassurance and nonjudgmental support. And then postpartum, when stay in place mandates have limited or eliminated the option of postpartum help from family and friends, it’s critical that I check-in with my clients to see how they are doing and to answer any questions or give any encouragement I can. It’s easy to feel isolated after giving birth in ordinary times. In a pandemic, it’s pretty much a guarantee.
While the current situation has made it so I am not physically present in their birth space, I’m still a presence at their birth. Let me elaborate. Some clients have chosen to have steady support by way of video, using Facetime or Zoom. We are in touch in early labor same as always, by phone or text. Then when their labor intensifies to the point that they would summon me to join them, we setup the video connection and I am there. The words are the same, the questions are those I would ask in person, and the recommendations are as the situation warrants (cold cloth, position changes, comfort measures). Sometimes I am quiet, assessing, watching and listening, ready to help when the need arises. But we know that women are made to birth and as such staying silent is as important or more so, than speaking.
Some clients have preferred steady connection the whole way through with text and phone calls and so I have honored that preference too. I have been so very pleased with the reception I have received as a virtual doula in our area hospitals as well. The nurses are working so hard to take care of their patients with the added stress that comes with working in the medical field during a pandemic. And they have graciously welcomed me to the birth space virtually. They have helped to incorporate me by moving the laptop when the partner has forgotten, so I have a better view of my client. I have had conversations with the nurse, midwife, or doctor when there is reason to talk about options and to encourage the birthing woman as a team. We are all still connected, still have the same goal, and still have a job to do.
While the current situation has its challenges, I am grateful to still have the opportunity to serve my clients. There is more need for doula support more than ever, with such a feeling of uncertainty day by day, and the fear about bringing new life into a world that feels so unsafe.
As doulas we can still do what we do best—support our clients, offer reassurance and encouragement, and to be a lifeline when they feel disconnected from the world. Hopefully, we can return to being a physical presence sooner rather than later. But for now, this will work. We have a job to do. And our clients are counting on us.
Virtual Doula-ing During Covid-19
