The birthing of my career as a childbirth educator and doula began over 18 years ago, on a cold fall evening as I pushed out my VBAC baby into the bed he was conceived in, surrounded in peace and love and welcomed earth side by his parents, grandmother, and loving midwives. There is something so otherworldly and generational when a baby’s first introduction to human life involves dim lights, hushed voices, warm hands, and landing safely on mother’s soft breast. How I wish all babies were introduced to this world in such a manner. Not all of my six children were born in a gentle way, but because of my knowledge and inner knowing of the BirthWorks philosophy, my children were all consciously welcomed in awareness and peace.
Life has brought me great surprises through raising children, navigating a divorce, and entering the life of single motherhood. And though I have had to take other jobs to provide an income for my growing family, always my heart has been with birth work… my life’s passion to witness and hold space for the women who birth themselves as they birth their babies. I have found that the choices I made in life to raise my children often coincide with how they were birthed… in love and peace and with a lot of wide open space for them to feel safe to explore who they are.
Recently, as I was attending a therapy session to release some past trauma and difficult feelings that I was holding onto, I was led into visualizations that reminded me so much of the work we do in our BirthWorks childbirth classes that it bought me back in time in my body to a workshop many years ago while attending training with Cathy Daub. Cathy was helping me release and deal with the grief from the separation from my daughter after her traumatic cesarean birth a few years before. The three day separation from her had caused significant trauma and guilt that I had not yet dealt with. It was crucial to release this in order to move forward in my path as a childbirth educator and doula. When Cathy led me through the guided visualizations to help my body create a new memory, I was holding my baby in my arms as soon as she was born. This is the memory my body has of her birth now. And I was changed from the inside out.
As I sat through the therapy this past week releasing feelings of grief and hurt, my body instantly reminded me of my experience during that childbirth training so many years before. And I knew in that moment where my next step was… that I belong with birthing women. One of the most amazing things about BirthWorks has been the inner knowing and trusting of my own intuition that it has instilled in me. How easy it is to forget who we are and what we are all about in the busyness and chaotic pace of life. And how easy is it that in a moment our body can remember and teleport us back to a time that has been imprinted into our cells.
The world is in the middle of a tumultuous and uncertain time. Yet, life continues on and babies will be born. And so it is a deep honor and with gratitude that I step back into the path of serving birthing women and their families and accept my calling alongside the women who have paved the way before me. I am BirthWorks reborn!
Blessed be.